Can Bertie and Stiffy just wrangle for eight thousand years, she said, with her chin in her hands and her face wreathed in smiles?
Yes, that’s all very well. You say come here immediately, but how dickens can I? You don’t understand relations between Pop Bassett and self. These not such as to make him welcome visit Bertram. Would inevitably hurl out on ear and set dogs on. Useless suggest putting on false whiskers and pretending be fellow come inspect drains, as old blighter familiar with features and would instantly detect imposture. What is to be done? What has happened? Why serious rift? What serious rift? How do you mean wedding broken off? Why dickens? What have you been doing to the girl? Reply.
“No, madam, Mr. Wooster is not in. No, madam, I do not know when he will return. No, madam, he left no message. Yes, madam, I will inform him.”
Illustration by Arthur Wallis Mills for P. G. Wodehouse’s “Sir Roderick Comes to Lunch”, The Strand Magazine, March 1922.